Category: Retirement

I find myself in an odd frame of mind of late. I am past the “normal” retirement age, but not all the way to the “maximum benefit” social security retirement age. I have a full-time job that I like a lot, but because I was a full-time student up until a month or so ago, it seems like I have a ton of extra time on my hands because half of what I was previously doing completely went away. I have no “big” long-term goal like the retirement PhD program that I completed before I retired. Now, I have nothing I am really doing “for the future.” I am trying to figure out what to do about that. So, while Lorena and I wait for our place in San Pedro to be ready enough for us to stay there for a month or two, I kind of have nothing on which to actually work other than my day job and that feels weird. I bought a bunch of really interesting theology books that I plan to read through, not fast, but I really want to find something if I can.

I have a verbal commitment with the CEO of my company to, God willing, continue to work for him until I am 70. Of course, lots of things can change, especially with a start-up company (although we seem to be on an upward climb) and even more especially with my health as I approach 70 (although it is quite good right now). Retirement is the furthest thing from my desires at this point. I seemed like I was leading an aimless life after I finished all my Ph.D. work just a couple of weeks ago. Since then, I have tried to identify some projects with longer term goals to do and actually even picked one. I have also purchased a few books, got onto an exercise and diet plan, and continue to work with Lorena’s brother, Lynn, in our real estate development and construction business in Mexico. All that, plus travel to visit the kids on the east coast and Grandma Conchita in Monterrey.

On paper, that seems like a lot of stuff to be doing. In terms of time, it is not an inordinate time sink. It is made a lot easier because I work from home. I get up in the morning at around 6 AM, read my Bible, write in my blog, work until around noon, try to leave the house to eat lunch with Lorena at least a couple of times per week, work until 5 PM or so, have a snack and read a book, eat dinner at around 7 PM, get on the treadmill and listen so podcasts or read for an hour, have a cup of decaf, and then go to bed. I only talk with Lynn about 1½ times per week. We travel and we travel about once per month, so that part does not take up too much time. It seems like I should be able to maintain a schedule like this until well after 70 if my mind and health remain good.

Lynn is working at setting up our house in Mexico so I can work from there, too. We really do hope to be able to live there for 3-4 months per year before too long. Maybe I can make it to 80 before I have to retire.

Dylan Thomas wrote:

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Kelly quoted this famous poem’s first line to me when we talked about what I planned to do next—after the retirement Ph.D. Honestly, I have been at loose ends since I finished. It was such a big, longitudinal project that I had not anticipated what I would do after it finished. It was like when the kids left home to go to college. We were so involved and invested in the mechanics of them doing well, we did not consider what to do when the left. The kids exit to college from home and and the Ph.D. completion. were both very precipitous. One instant there was too much stuff to complete and the next instant there was just nothing.

The other wildcard in our current situation is that I am past retirement age by three years. I work with people of good will and like my work in my day job. The CEO has asked me to stay until I am at least 70 and then work as much as I want after that. I view that as a literal gift from God. I get to work from wherever I want with some old friends (both over 75 years old) in what is normally a 40 hour work week. Truly, this is a luxury for me. But that leaves time on my hands and it is bad for me to be idle. The funny deal is that it is bad for my health to be idle, too. I tend to get more exercise and maintain more discipline in eating when I am busy.

So, the question is, what should I do? I will be done and back in the same boat if I pick something to small. If I pick something too big, I will be dead before I complete it. Realistically, God willing, I think of have maybe ten years to do one to three relatively big (for me) things. My list of potential projects is pretty small so I am reaching out to friends and family to help me identify something that really looks worthwhile. The list so far includes:

• Earn a Juris Doctor degree
• Write a book on our father-directed homeschool

That is it. I cannot think of much else. Lorena and I want to travel some, but right now that will be to go down to Mexico to visit Grandma Conchita and to the east coast to visit Kelly and Christian.

I think one thing that might help is to start writing in this blog more. It helps organize my thoughts and might help get me pushed off center to the next big thing.

The semester is over, the kids are on a two week vacation in Europe (probably the first of two this summer), and we have nothing much to do other than batten down the hatches for the stifling North Texas summer. It often feels like we are just waiting for the next thing to happen, but it is not really true. Lorena and I have several active projects that require serious attention and effort including the apartments (still preparing to sell) and the house (getting the remodel ready for ourselves and our visitors) in Mexico, landscape construction projects, dissertation research, two more classes, and my comprehensive exam for school, and other stuff we want to complete, if God is willing, before I retire. We have it all laid out, but one thing we have done differently than in previous major efforts as we arrived to a defined end, we have decided we need to take some time to smell the roses.

If we take another year, again, God willing, it does not matter that much. We want to visit the kids as much as possible, go on a trip or two to Mexico and to Europe, and just take things with a whole lot more calm than before. The way we see it, retirement is not when you quit, but when you start with something new. The problem is that we do not have that next thing quite figure out. We are going to try to spend more time with the kids and with Lorena’s mom and I plan to continue with some consulting if I can and continue to perform volunteer research, but it seems very, very unstructured. That is also okay, but it is so gratifying to have positive means and ends in mind that it would be a shame to throw that all aside at the end.

I added another image taken from the same place, but an hour later. The mountain frequently appears pink as the suns starts to set in the evening–often it is much more pink than what is shown here. We are grateful to have this spectacular view.

I cannot help myself. It is January in rainy Washington state and yet Mt. Rainier looks like this from our living room window in the middle of the winter. This is important because we have been trying to make some retirement decisions. Christian is months away from graduating with his PhD and who knows where he will land after he graduates. Kelly has an opportunity on the east coast for, at least, a couple of years that she cannot pass up. I am, God willing, about three years from retirement. Everything seems to be up in the air and there is no way to know where we should be or what we should be doing in the next few  years. This view from our window and our kids love for our new place is going a good way in helping us make that decision.

Last week, one of my very long term colleagues (Frank E. ~35 years) flew out to Boston to consult with my current employer on my behalf. We had dinner one evening and discussed retirement and how to do it. I learned a lot and am ever grateful for his mentorship when I was a young engineer and, even more, his mentorship now as a soon to retire, senior level engineer. Based on my conversations with Frank, Lorena and I are pretty sure now that we should stay where we are in Washington, both for financial reasons and for spiritual and personal reasons. Grateful is the best word to describe about these recent interactions. God is good.